We often have a hard time understanding that love is universal. Some of us look into the details too much and believe that the way we love or others love us never measures up. The truth is we forget, very often, that love is inside of us and we have to identify it and treat it with care. Once we identify the way we love from the inside, we can then love ourselves first and have the strength and energy to love others as well.
Yes this is something that can get complicated because for some of us we love hard. Some of us don’t know how to love others, and in turn we create a chaotic situation, complicating our relationships and our friendships. But at the end of the day we want to love others and we want to feel loved. No matter how hard your shell is on the outside, your insides yearn for human affection. It is a big part of being human. Wanting a human connection and a human touch, as well as being taken care of and being treated with respect. These all go hand in hand. But first, we deserve these things from ourselves.
Loving from the inside out
We live our whole lives seeking love from the outside. This takes a toll on how we understand love and how well we understand our need for it. Sometimes the love we are shown is distorted and that ultimately affects how we believe we deserve love in general. The more distorted the image of love we have the less we feel we deserve to have it. And lets not mention how you love yourself. That also diminishes over time and you can go down a very dark spiral. That needs to change. You matter and you have the capability of loving yourself enough to love others and not feel empty. The earlier on we learn this the better it is for us. For some of us unfortunately we learn this as adults. This in turn leaves us with little wiggle room to fix broken connections we may have damaged along the way. But the root or the base of how we love others starts with how we love ourselves.
On this day
Reflect on how you love yourself. Go over all the ways you love yourself and others. Pour into yourself in the areas that you know you need to pour into. Take a deep breath and understand that not everyone knows how to love in the same way. Yes, everyone is unique and gives love in different forms. Enjoy every moment life brings to you safely during these times, as well as living life to the best of your own ability. If you have a special someone, before “showing” your love, be present and just say how you feel for and about them first. During these difficult times, hugging someone you love and being there means more than any material gift. If you are single, perhaps enjoy time with friends or loved ones, or take yourself to a special place and pamper yourself (can be done at home as well). Either way, there is always a way to feel the love on this V-Day. Make your favorite dish, paint your nails, give and get a lovely massage, the possibilities are endless. For me, it is the little things that count. You know, that morning kiss on the forehead with the sweet voice of my babe saying happy Valentines Day. That to me means more than anything else. Just enjoy yourself and put yourself first. You can’t pour out your love to others if you are on empty. That includes your children as well.